I totally suck.

It's nearly Christmas, I haven't been counting calories or even TRYING in the past like... month and a half. I hate it.


I reread my blog... I only managed to keep up with the calorie counting thing for like 3 days. Wow. That isn't good at all. I have extreme self discipline problems. 


Now, my goal to lose weight has punishment as a reinforcement instead of a reward (like the original idea). Originally, my mom was going to give me a great sum of money to lose the weight. Now, she's saying that I, along with both my parents, have to be well on our way to 15 pounds by the beginning of February or we won't be going on a cruise. YIKES! I love cruising.


Also, I found a bathing suit that I LOVE and I want to be able to wear it. However, it's kind of tiny. I would never be able to wear it right now. NEVER.


I went through a rough patch for a bit during school. I thought that maybe I had ADD or ADHD because I have extreme issues with motivation and studying. I went to a counselor and he told me he didn't think it was likely. So I'll get over it I suppose. I got my grades back for the semester. Could have been better... I ended up getting A, A-,B+, and B and I'm still waiting on one more but I think it'll be really bad. I was awful in that class. Probably a D+ or a C- :(. 


ANYWAY, I'm not sure I want to start dramatically changing my diet before the New Year because it's so difficult to get started during the holiday season. I think I'm going to start trying to eat/drink more antioxidants. I feel like with the amount of nasty fast food I've been eating, my body must be FILLED with them. I'm considering getting a body wrap after I get back from break, that would be a nice refreshing starting point for a change in lifestyle. We'll see whats cheapest.